“Some Children Are Quick”

This came to me as an email forward but I did find it very cute:

TEACHER:      Maria, go to the map and find   North America.
MARIA:             Here it  is.
TEACHER:      Correct.  Now class, who discovered   America ?
CLASS:               Maria.
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TEACHER:    John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN:              You told me to do it without using tables.
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TEACHER:  Glenn, how do you spell ‘crocodile?’
GLENN:         K-R-O-K-O-D-I-A-L’
TEACHER:  No, that’s wrong
GLENN:         Maybe it is wrong, but you asked me how I spell it.

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TEACHER:   Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD:       H I J K L M N O.
TEACHER:   What are you talking about?
DONALD:       Yesterday you said it’s H to O.
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TEACHER:   Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn’t have ten years ago.
WINNIE:        Me!
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TEACHER:   Glen, why do you always get so dirty?
GLEN: Well, I’m a  lot closer to the ground than you are.
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TEACHER:     Millie, give me a sentence starting with ‘  I.  ‘
MILLIE:          I  is..
TEACHER:     No, Millie….. Always say, ‘I  am.’
MILLIE:         All right…  ‘I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.’
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TEACHER:    George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree, but also admitted it.
Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?
LOUIS:             Because George still had  the axe in his hand….
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TEACHER:    Now, Simon , tell me frankly, do you say prayers before eating?
SIMON:           No sir, I don’t have to, my Mom is a good cook.
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TEACHER:       Clyde , your  composition on ‘My Dog’ is exactly the same as your   brother’s.. Did you copy his?
CLYDE  :            No, sir. It’s the same dog.

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TEACHER:    Harold, what do you call a person who keeps on talking when people are no longer  interested?
HAROLD:      A teacher

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